The Joys Of Raising A Child
by Anonymous Improvement
Summary: Superfamily. Steve and Tony adopt a little boy named Peter. This is a series, where every chapter, young Peter finds any and all ways to prevent his loving parents from having sex. M for language and mild sexual situations. (since Peter never allows more than that)
1. Chapter 1

Disclaimer: I do not own Avengers, or any affiliated characters (no matter how much I wish I did)

Summary: This is a superfamily fic, where Tony and Steve adopt a baby named Peter. Every chapter is another failed attempt at sex... Peter interrupting each time.

Warning: M for sexual situations and offensive language.

Author's Note: This chapter has a bit more of a choppy sentence structure. It will change a bit as the story progresses. Let me know what you think, reviews encourage me, and criticism makes me a better writer :)

Prolog/first chapter

* * *

Steve was, if anything else, a simple man. He didn't' need the extravagance of his relatively new lifestyle. I fact, he didn't really want it. He was perfectly content in his "crappy" little apartment. But here he was, in the tower of one Tony Stark.

Now, if one was to look at Steve (objectively of course), one could easily make a list of his characteristics. He was large, brave, strong, loyal, sensitive- a gentleman. But there was one thing he could tell you he wasn't. Gay. Nope. Steve Rogers was no fag. He could tell you if he wanted to.

Yet, here he was- sitting in the living room of one Tony Stark, reading the paper (that indirectly belonged to said Tony Stark). But that doesn't make one a fag, it doesn't. Plenty of friends live together, and no self-respecting man doesn't read the paper.

But then there was no paper. There were work calloused hands prying it from Steve, and chapped lips on his.

Now this didn't make Steve a fag, no, plenty of men have their girlfriends come over, and plenty of men kiss their girlfriend. Plenty of me let their girlfriends ease them onto their back. That certainly did not make Steve a fag.

But maybe it was because the "girlfriend" pushing him down and kissing him senseless was one Tony Stark. And maybe Tony was short for Anthony. And maybe that's definitely a man's name. And maybe that made him a man. But that did not make Steve a fag.

Then Steve's arms wrapped around neck and pulled him closer. Steve was enjoying himself. Maybe, _maybe_ that made Steve a fag. Maybe he loved the man above him. Loved him for everything from his stupid jokes to the bags under his eyes.

Maybe Steve remembered that he was ok with being a fag. Maybe he remembered that he should be saying "gay", since "fag" hurt his feelings too. Maybe he was adjusting to this big house, his limp the morning after, and the man above him, kissing him senseless.

He should have been happy with this situation. He should have been content to just be with the person he loved… but he wasn't. Steve couldn't help it. There was something missing. He knew what it was… but would Tony understand? Steve NEEDED to be a family man. He was _designed_ to be a family man. He was designed to serve his country, and raise a few boyscouts and girlscouts along the way. Being a f-gay, changed that situation.

"Tony. I want kids!" Crap. Now it was out there… Maybe Tony would understand.

Maybe Tony really couldn't understand. Maybe he hit his head and forgot who he was… because a week went by without Tony emerging from his lab… but when he did, he agreed to an adoption.

Maybe Steve had been asleep the whole time. Maybe none of this was real. Maybe he went crazy because after a few months of paperwork and hell, they were getting a baby.

A little boy in fact. Peter Parker. Peter Parker. Steve couldn't stop saying it. It was addictive. He was getting a baby. He was going to have a family. A perfect family- well, his perfect family.

Tony sat, rigid as they signed their final papers. He couldn't believe he had agreed to this insanity. He had just wanted it too badly for Tony to deny him. He tried to. He really did, but he just couldn't.

Steve squeezed his hand, shocking him back into reality. This was a good thing. This was going to be a good thing. The look on Steve's face proved that to him. He just knew.

The rest of the day was a blur for both of them, full of confusion, happiness, and fear.

And then they were in the car, on their way home with the new baby, cradled in Steve's protective arms. Tony could feel himself losing his patience, and his nerve. Steve just kept repeating the child's name, in complete awe. He repeated it, repeated their names, then repeated the cycle. It was nerve wracking. This was real. They had a kid. A living, breathing, child. This was happening.

"Can you stop that?!" Tony snapped, overwhelmed and annoyed. Which, of course, set Peter off into another crying fit. Steve shot his boyfriend a glare, rocking the infant to calm him down.

After a lot of fuss, a feeding, and two hours of Telly-Tubies, their first night with Peter was over.

A few hectic days passed, and Tony could swear he was in hell. The end of the week rolled in, and Tony was, as usual, locked in his lab, avoiding the baby.

A knock on the door jolted him out of his work.

"Tony? Can I come in?"

"Do you have the baby?" Tony was not about to let that thing in his lab.

"No."

"Fine." With the okay, Steve stepped into the room.

Tony turned back to work, knowing Steve was going to tell him to spend time with the kid. He braced himself for the shouting that never came. Instead, hands rested on his shoulders, kneading out all of the tension and stress.

Tony relaxed almost instantly, leaning into the touch. It had only been a week, but he could swear he had forgotten what Steve's touch felt like. He tilted his head a bit at the feeling of lips on his neck. "Steve..."

"Sorry baby, I've been too busy to pay a lot of attention to you. Were you lonely?"

Tony murmured his agreement and tangled a hand in Steve's hair, holding him against his neck.

"I'll take care of you now, don't worry." Tony was pleased to say the least, if wasn't everyday Steve took charge. He leaned his head back onto the blonde as a hand slipped into his pants, coaxing him to life. Tony groaned, bucking into his hand. It was nearly as satisfying when he was using his own hand (no matter how much more skilled it is).

And that's when it happened.

The baby monitor.

The fucking baby monitor.

The.

Fucking.

Baby.

Monitor.

Peter was crying again.

Steve cursed softly. "I'm sorry Tony, I have to..." And with that, he guiltily went to calm down Peter.

If Tony thought he was in hell before... he was really in for it.

* * *

I hope you enjoyed.


	2. Chapter 2

Hey guys, sorry for not updating. Hurricane Sandy kicked my ass. But! I am back now!

Disclaimer: I do not own the Avengers, this is purely fanmade.

Warning: mild sexual situations

* * *

Days passed, and Steve's promise to "make it up to him" was as empty as Tony's stomach. He couldn't remember his last good meal. Pepper didn't hang around much now; she had her own life now that Steve took over a good amount of her Tony sitting. She didn't order him food anymore, and Steve was too busy fussing with the baby to remember ha he had to feed Tony too.

His stomach growled, digesting it's lining in a desperate attempt for nourishment. Now, Tony could feed himself, he wasn't an idiot… but Thor's box of old poptarts can only get a man so far.

He vaguely considered eating he baby- not because he's a cannibal, not because he had PTSD (which he did NOT have before), and certainly not because it looked delicious- but oh, how wonderful it would be to get rid of it! And he would even get to fill his empty stomach as well.

The doorbell woke him out of his thoughts, which were soon replaced by thoughts of pizza. Good, old fashioned, New York pizza. Just for being the man who brought him real food he tipped he pizza boy a twenty. He would have given more, but then he would have just seemed desperate. He dropped to the couch and flipped open the box, shoving a slice into his watering mouth. He yelped as it burned his tongue and scalded the roof of his mouth.

Tony cursed and put down the slice. None of this would have happened if Steve had ordered it. He would have made Tony wait. He would have held Tony's face in his hands and said he would give him something else to distract his lips. And his lips would have been unusually soft for a man- for a soldier, and he would hold Tony close to stop him from getting the pizza. When it was cool enough, he would let go, and Tony would dive for the food, ravenous. Tony suddenly felt lonely. He sighed, eating his now cooled pizza.

Arms wrapped around him as if his longing called out to Steve. "Did you wait for it to cool?" He hummed his answer, tilting his head to give Steve's lips more room on his neck.

"You put the kid to sleep?"

"Tony, his name is Peter. And he might like you more if you actually used it."

Tony sighed. "Fine. Did you put _Peter_ to sleep?"

This earned him a smile.

"Yes, I dd. And if we're lucky, we'll have a few hours all to ourselves." He nuzzled back into Tony's neck. "But you should eat first." He tilted Tony's face toward him. "You look like you haven't eaten a decent meal in weeks."

Tony bit his tongue to stop the snarky response that sprang to his lips. Steve wasn't wrong. The bag under Tony's eyes had darkened and deepened, his skin had a sick tint to it, and his lips were pale. He hadn't felt much like eating without Steve. He felt more like having rough sex with random strangers. Preferably women. But he resisted like the goo boyfriend he was trying to be.

He munched on his pizza, trying to shove the slice whole down his throat. Steve grabbed a piece for himself, eating much slower.

On second glance, Steve wasn't looking much better. His usual pristine hair looked matted and unkempt. His blue eyes looked dull with tire; his usual bright face was hindered by the slight bags that had developed beneath his eyes. It couldn't be denied that he needed sleep.

Tony finished his second piece with a content sigh. He wanted another, but a good half hour had gone by, and fucking Steve into the couch was a much more pressing matter.

He leaned over to them blonde, pulling him closer by his shirt. "I have a proposition for you Spangles." Steve raised a suspicious eyebrow, not bothering to address the nickname. 'You let me," He paused, remember Steve's last rage over his word choice (which, if Tony really thought about it, Steve was under a great deal of stress that time too- and maybe, maybe, Tony's word choice was quite crude), "make love to you, right now, I'll take care of th-Peter for tonight, and you can sleep, uninterrupted, all night tonight."

Steve's face broke into a grin. "I love you baby, you're so sweet… I doubt you can handle that though." He yawned. "But if you're willing to try…"

He was answered with a sharp tug on his shirt, and chapped lips over his. Steve wrapped his arms around the engineer's neck, pressing into the rough embrace.

Tony pushed him back, making quick work of Steve's shirt. He never thought he would ever want to thank his father, but as he looked over his boyfriend, there was probably nothing he wanted to do more- besides Steve anyway.

Steve writhed beneath him as abused a sensitive spot on his neck. "Tease… just get on with it. I'm no daisy." Tony grinned, it had taken him a while, but he learned to understand a lot of Steve's out of date slang.  
"Alright, alright… let me just go to our room and grab some lube, it's been a while- and before you say it, I know you're not a chick- but you'll bitch like one if you're sore tomorrow, and you know it."

Steve scoffed. "Jacket pocket. I came prepared." Tony's smirk just widened.

"God, you're perfect." He laughed lightly, blindly fishing for Steve's discarded jacket on the floor. His hand wrapped around a thin cylinder and he pulled it up. "Gotcha."…and for a second he thought he grabbed the bottle, but it was much too… fleshy to be the bottle. He frowned and looked at the baby, now dangling from Tony's hand by the wrist.

Steve gasped and rushed to cover himself, ignoring the painful way his now softening cock pressed against the front of his trousers. "I know I secured the crib!" Peter giggled and reached out for the parent he was familiar with. From his free wrist dangled a string of web, and from that, a bar of his crib. "Tony… what is…" Tony blinked, at a loss for words.

"I don't… Steve I have no…" He tore the web from the baby's wrist, confused.

Several emotions settled over Steve's face before it settled on panic. "Should we… should we take him to a doctor? Tony, what do we do? What if they lock him up!" Tony bit his tongue as the word 'good' sprung to his lips.

"It's ok Steve, we'll figure this out…" And with that, Tony reluctantly buttoned his pants. He wasn't getting laid tonight either.

* * *

Thank you for reading! I hope I was able to entertain~ Please review and such to let me know what you think!


	3. Chapter 3

Disclaimer: I do no own the Avengers

A/N The sexual description is more graphic than last time, you're warned.

Enjoy.

* * *

Had there been more time, Steve might have thought this plan through. But there wasn't, and time could quite possibly have been a huge factor.

So there Steve was, batting at their baby with a broom.

"You know babe, I don't there's a designated spot in your ridiculous baby book for learning to climb." He smirked a little, closing the already overflowed album.

Steve scowled, dropping the broom. "This isn't funny! And it's no time for jokes! NO! Peter, don't!" Peter just giggled, continuing his crawled path over the ceiling. "Help me get him down!" Steve grabbed for him again, horrifically unsuccessful.

"Hey, you wanted the kid. You get him down." With some arguing, they were able to get Peter down, and tucked him back into bed.

Steve pushed his hair out of his face. "He can't even walk yet and he's already a handful." Tony groaned as he flopped back on their bed. "JARVIS. TV. On. Same Channel. "

Steve cringed a little at the obvious sound of sex coming from the TV. "You know, you could just use the remote."

"But then I have to get up, and I'm not willing to." He lazily watched the TV. "And isn't it weird that he can't walk yet? I think I was doing math when I was his age."

Steve sighed, stripping off his shirt. "Not all of us were super geniuses. It happens. His body might develop differently from… other kids."

"Yeah, I still haven't figured out what the hell is wrong with-" Steve shot him a glare as he buttoned up his shirt. His husband rolled his eyes. "/Fine/. I still haven't figured out what's 'special' about him." He rolled over, watching Steve. "Kids a mystery. Now would you stop putting on clothes? Damn Rogers, thought your stripping meant I was finally getting laid." He flopped back. "It's been like a week since we last fucked. Come on; look what I'm resorting to?" He made a lazy gesture to the TV.

The soldier just chuckled. "Well gee; you sure know how to romance a guy." He slipped off his pants, neatly folding them. "But since you asked so nicely, I suppose we can do something tonight."

Tony perked up, looking interested. "Really?"

Steve laughed. "If you can convince me."

"You're on soldier boy." Tony was on him in seconds, tugging at his pajama shirt, kissing and nipping any available bit of skin.

Steve frowned at his torn buttons. "Hey, I liked that shirt."

Tony pushed him back onto the bed, pulling his own shirt over his head. "I'll buy you a new one! Now can we please focus on the fact that I'm horny and on top of you?"

"Right, sorry." Steve pulled him closer to kiss him, licking open the button on his pants. The billionaire reached blindly into the night table drawer, pulling the lube out as they kissed.

The genius pulled away, moving off his lap. "Alright Rogers, on your back."

Steve rolled his eyes, moving to lay back. "Oh Tony. How you romance me." Tony quirked a smile at his husband's monotone irony.

"You know it babe. Now spread 'em. I'll romance you on the second round. Right now, I have to be inside you."

He popped open the lid on the tube, pouring a generous amount onto his fingers. He tugged at one of Steve's legs, trying to give himself more room.

"Tony, wait, turn the TV off, I'm not doing this if I have to listen to that... movie."

"JARVIS, you heard the man." The super soldier closed his eyes as the first finger pressed into him, focusing on relaxing.

The blonde frowned at the sound of music. "Tony, this isn't funny. I didn't ask you to change the channel, I asked you to turn it off."

Tony looked over at the TV, brows furrowing in confusion. "I did, see?" Steve's eyes snapped open, wide with confusion and worry.

"Then we have to check out where it's coming from."

A sigh escaped Tony. "I figured." Steve got up and grabbed some pants, quickly slipping them on. Tony grumbled, but did the same.

Steve quietly opened the door, his smaller lover at his side, on the alert. "...You've got to be fucking kidding me." Tony scowled at the little boy in the living room. But that was okay. Steve could put him back to bed. Then he could get back to more important things.

"Oh... Tony... it's his first time standing on his own."

Shit.

Aaaand, Steve was back in father mode. "Oh Peter!" He rushed into the living room, giving the tiny boy a gentle hug. Peter giggled along to Wow Wow Wubzy, enjoying the bright colors and pop songs. Tony sighed and sat heavily on the couch. He might as well enjoy it too. Not like he's going to get laid or anything.

* * *

Sorry 'bout that. I had a lot of stuff to do.


	4. Chapter 4

Hi! Thank you so much for reading this, and accept my deepest apologize for not updating in so long. My computer crashed and I just got a new one. So, I'm back~

Warning: Adult situations and Tony's filthy mouth

Disclaimer: This is purely fan made, I have no association or claim over Marvel characters.

* * *

Steve sighed and closed the storybook. It had taken almost an hour, but Peter was finally asleep. He looked over and gently tugged the blanket over the small child.

"Good night." He kissed Peter's forehead before turning out the light and quietly closing the door.

"He's asleep?" Tony asked over the intercom.

"Mhm. And you're reading him Cinderella tomorrow, so don't forget." Steve spoke to the ceiling, not entirely coordinated with using JARVIS like this. "And dinner is in five minutes, so wash up." Steve went to the kitchen, washing his own hands.

He peeked in the oven, where the macaroni and cheese was reheating for them.

He smiled at the familiar shuffle of feet and a tell tale yawn. "What are you working on down there anyway?"

"Nothing excited. I'm just re-calibrating an old-" He was already answered with a blank look. "Green energy. Like wind energy and stuff, Steve."

Steve smiled, taking the mac&cheese out of the oven. "That's really neat. You can tell me about it while we eat... if you want."

He filled them each a bowl and carried them to the table, Tony following behind. Tony lazily flopped in his chair, pulling the bowl close and savoring the warmth. "Smells good babe." He took a generous spoonful, not bothering to wait until he swallowed to start talking. Steve rolled his eyes at Tony's lack of tact, knowing it would just encourage him to shove more food in his mouth while he talks. Instead he just not nodded along, making appropriate comments when he could.

Steve jerked and gasped, nearly choking on his food. Tony raised an eyebrow at him, but continued talking, calm as ever- as if his foot wasn't sliding up his lovers leg. But Steve could swear he saw a hint of a smirk.

That bastard.

Steve tried to pay attention, squirming. He put in his best effort to pretend not to notice, eating his pasta. The soldier nodded along with Tony, because he was not going to let Tony have his way.

It was the principle of the th- ohGodhisfootwassohighhecouldcountthechangeinhispoc ket.

He nearly choked, bright red at the smirk his boyfriend could no longer hide.

He kept eating and talking, scrapping his bowl when he emptied it. "You okay babe?" His ft slid higher until he was gently pressing it against the crotch of his pants.

Steve pushed his bowl away, officially done with attempting to eat. "I'm actually not." He tensed, chewing on the inside of his cheek at Tony's antics.

Tony raised an eyebrow, smirk creeping into his speech. "Maybe your tired, you should get some rest." He stole Steve's bowl, eating his macaroni as well, foot gently massaging the area, coaxing a certain part of his anatomy to life.

The engineer grinned wider at uncomfortable shift Steve made and the way his eyes seemed to un-focus. He rubbed a little harder, just eating.

This was going to be fun.

"Steve... baby... sweetheart..." He spoke, voice dripping with over-exaggerated sweetness. "You know... I've always had this fantasy..." Steve perked up in interest.

This is going to be a lot of fun.

"It's just a little fantasy... nothing big. We're sitting in a restaurant." He pressed a little firmer. "We're sitting in a restaurant, and we start playing footsie like we usually do. I give you a little nudge, you nudge back... but then I run my foot up your leg, which catches you off guard, but you don't really mind, because it's innocent enough. But then I'm stoking your inner thigh... and soon, I'm pressing it right over your dick and rubbing. Firm and slow." He demonstrated, Steve turning redder by the second. "And you would glare at me and blush, like you always do when I tease, because God, you just can't help yourself, can you? You're desperate for me all the time, wanting and eager, because you've never experienced anything like the pleasure I give you."

Steve's face could probably cook eggs at this point. "But I don't stop. I rub firm and hard, coaxing you to full hardness until you're uncomfortable and squirming, looking around, desperately hoping no one sees what I'm doing to you. And when the waitress asks how you're doing, I have to answer for you, and you hate the way I smile at her. Like I can freely flirt while I make you desperate." He grinned at Steve's now straining zipper. "But you can't ask for more, you can't risk that, can't risk anyone hearing how ready you are to beg for it."

Steve let out a helpless sound, not really forming coherent thoughts at the moment. "Oh, but then I slip under the table, and I undo your belt, because you were too embarrassed to wear your suspenders, and slowly, slowly I unzip your jeans, the rough denim making you hiss as it slides over your length, because you know I love it when you go cammando." Steve was squirming now. "And I run my hand over your cock, just to tease. But I know you need more, so I lean down and take the head in my mouth, sucking softly. One of your hands makes it's way under the table, grabbing my hair and _pulling_, just the way I like it. The way you do when you need me. And I'll slowly take in more, because I like to tease you. Like the way you shift, the needy noises you make- oh, but you have to hold back because we're in public. And that's _wrong_, but that makes you even more hard. Because you like to be bad, but Captain America sure can't admit that. But that's the best part isn't it? Being bad, and loving it, loving the way I torture you into letting go."

Steve clenched and unclenched his hands, trying to keep them from drifting below the table. Tony vaguely wondered if he could make Steve come right in his pants from just his words and a little rubbing. "And I'm moving quickly on you now, because I know we don't have a lot of time, and you're trying to keep quiet, but _damn_, you're just so vocal when we're fucking, it's a wonder you're holding out this long."

He grinned at the moisture seeping through Steve's pants, knowing he's on the edge. "And then you can't stop yourself, and you're coming, and I'm taking it like a champ, just the way you like, swallowing every drop. And you're wrecked in your seat, embarrassed and needy and so, so sensitive."

Tony grinned at the way Steve shook with his effort to control himself. He dropped to his knees, crawling over to Steve. "I think these pants might be ruined Steve." He flicked open the button and zipper in one swift motion, not missing the sigh of relief that swept through Steve.

It was going to be a great night, he just knew.

But he was wrong.

How wrong he was.

A yawn sounded a few feet away and Tony froze, feeling Steve tense above him. "Daddy?"

"Y-yes...?" He heard Steve shakily respond.

"I'm thwisty." The toddler complained, rubbing his eyes. Steve made a motion to get up, but thought better of it, Tony still frozen between his legs.

"Your sippy cup on the bottom shelf of the fridge. Okay Petie? Why don't you just grab it, and you can take it to bed with you, okay?" Peter nodded and shuffled to the fridge, yanking it open on the fourth try. He grabbed the little cup and shuffled back to his room, closing the door behind him.

Tony sighed out the breath he didn't know he was holding. "You don't want me to suck you off anymore, do you?" He frowned, his own hard on having gone slightly soft from the interruption.

Steve's voice came weak from above him, still shaky from the horror of almost being caught by their son. "N-no.. not really.. I'm not..um, in the mood.. anymore..."

Tony sighed and got up, holding his clearly terrified boyfriend close. "Why don't we get to bed? No funny business, we can just cuddle, okay?" Steve nodded, standing up on slightly shaky legs.

Tony knew there was no point in pushing the fact that they hadn't had sex recently, and just walked to his bedroom, snuggling up to his large, teddy bear of a boyfriend.

He almost missed Steve mumbling before he fell asleep. Almost.

But he was sure he didn't mishear.

Steve distinctly whispered, "Morning sex." And that was all Tony needed to have a good dream that night.

* * *

Thanks for reading! Let me know what you think :) Oh, and just a reminder that I write on request, so if you really want something written, just shoot me a message^^


End file.
